I often come across small mistakes or superfluous details in the screenplays I read or translate, which could so easily be avoided with a little attention. Some I have already mentioned in this guide, but are so common they deserve highlighting.

This is very personal, and veers away somewhat from rules of formatting. You may find one or two of these mistakes far too trivial to deserve mentioning. Others you won’t even believe that screenwriters make. But I’m afraid they do, and all too often!

1) Use the same character name, and place names in sluglines, throughout the screenplay.

Don’t start, halfway through, calling KENNEDY the PRESIDENT or JFK, and never exchange, for example, COTTAGE for HOUSE, if it is the same location. Especially important for those co-writing their scripts.

2) Never write "we see".

Instead of "We see a couple walking along...", write "A couple is walking along...".

Also avoid the word "camera", as in: "The camera shows shelves full of dusty old books running the whole length of the corridor." Just write "Shelves of dusty old books run the whole length of the corridor."

3) Don’t repeat, in the action/description, information which is already established by the slugline.

For example, if we’re in "INT. KITCHEN - DAY", don’t, halfway through the scene, write: "John ENTERS the kitchen, slamming the door behind him". Just write "John ENTERS, slamming the door behind him".

4) Always use a new slugline when we change place (INT. to EXT. or vice versa).

I see a lot of sluglines like this: INT./EXT. HOUSE - DAY

5) Always use a new slugline when we change time.

A lot of screenwriters just write: "Passage of time", where they’d definitely need a new slugline, such as:

INT. PALACE/DRAWING ROOM - NIGHT - LATER

6) Never write: "Sandra sits down and comments".

But: "Sandra sits down" followed by her speech. On the other hand, and believe it or not, I’ve come across the phrase "Helen doesn’t reply" followed by that character’s speech, replying!

7) Use parentheticals very sparingly.

I can’t emphasize this enough. As already mentioned, if the dialogue is crystal clear, these directions are usually unnecessary. When a character breaks a precious vase, you don’t need to tell the actress how to say "You stupid idiot!" .

Unless, of course, she is his lover, couldn’t care less about her husband’s vase and is saying it seductively.

So, parentheticals are used to avoid ambiguities in the dialogue; when the character turns to another person -(to Martin); or when he or she makes small important gestures, such as (pointing the gun), or (hiding the diamond), and you don’t want to break the rhythm of the speech with action.

8) Avoid excessive "looks at".

As in "James looks at Mary"; "Katie looks at her mother", etc., especially when there are only two people in the scene, and in all likelihood look at each other from time to time. Leave this to the soap operas, where the entire drama is limited to furtive glances, cruel slaps and passionate kisses.

Copyright © 1996-2000 by Hugo Moss
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